Bugs and Humidity

Well, we are back in Kansas City. I had fogotten, or blocked out, the humidity and bugs. Especially the bugs. We have been here for 6 days now and both of the kids and myself look like we have a weird skin aliment.....red bumps all over our legs and arms....bug bites. ICKY!!

The weather is supposed to cool down, soon.

Cross pens

The other day I was not paying alot of attention to what Sean was doing when something caught my eye. I looked over to see him writing a note and I was overcome by a wave of nostaglia. He was using a gold Cross pen. Growing up that is the same style of pen my father used. He always had it with him. It is one of those silly memories that you think of at the strangest times and it always makes you smile.

Anytime I see someone writing with a gold Cross pen I think of my dad and smile.

10 days and counting

We have 10 days left in WA.

This week has been eventful. Nic left last Tuesday for KC. He has moved to Kearney with his Dad and Shannon for the school year. He will be a sophmore at Kearney High. He enrolled Friday and has chosen the acedemic diploma courses. I was enformed he has his on blog now too.

My last day as the Director of Health and Wellness was Friday. I am still on staff and finishing things up this week. It was nice and scarey this weekend to know that the ambulance was at the building 3 times and I was not called to handle any of them. :)

Ian will start home school this week. We have decided with all the chaos it would be the best solution for now. Once we get to KC I will meet with someone from the school district to decide how to proceed.

This week will be catching up and getting things ready to ship or fly to KC.

Those moments when you dont know what to do...

I am having alot of those moments lately when you just don't know what to do. You are so overwhelmed by the things going on around you that you don't even know where to start, or stop, or....well anything. One of my favorite sayings is from Mother Teresa. She says something to the affect of...God only gives you what you can handle, but I sure wish he didn't trust me so much. I am sure he knows I can handle the things going on, and I am sure there is a plan somewhere in this chaos.

Currently, I am subscribing to another saying...When it rains it pours!.... I just keep asking God for a bigger bucket.

How many Mondays are allowed in a week?

Ok, I know that technically yesterday was Monday. Boy was it Monday. However the way today went I would swear it was Monday all over again. It doesn't happen that often but, this is shaping up to be a week full of Mondays.

As way of explaination...Mondays are the days that nothing really goes wrong. However things do not go as planned.
That dinner you had planned to make requires milk, you get home to find no milk. So you make something else but crave the first thing.
You are going along with a spreadsheet only to find that your computer locks up and you only have 3/4 of it saved.
These are the kind of things that have happened all day. Nothing horrible, nothing earth-shattering, just nothing right either.

Heart wrenching decision

The decision has been made. We are moving back to Missouri at the beginning of September. Although it has been really difficult to make this decision now that we have I feel a great weight has been lifted from my shoulders. I am excited to see my family again. I am going to miss my friends here in WA but with the great internet we will still be able to talk frequently.

Now the fun really begins....trying to figure out what stuff to keep and what to get rid of. It is amazing how much stuff you can accumulate in 4 years.

Ok, so my dad is out of surgery but they weren't able to take out the cancer. I am really struggling to wrap my head around this. It is really difficult to be all the way out in WA while he is in a hospital in MO. So now I am faced with the decision of staying here in WA where I have a good job and a few friends, or moving my family back to MO and essentially starting over job wise but being where my family is. It is a really hard place to be. The two little ones are to young to have established lasting friendships, the teenagers have long-term girlfriends but also a sense of duty to the family. Although they arent thrilled with the possibility they are willing to go. Sean is a whole other thing. He has been here for years and is established in the community and church. He has always sworn he won't go back to MO, until now.

This is a hard choice.

Beyond help....

This was just too perfect not to post!!!!!

being a fixer

I was reminded today that is ok to just do what you can. Sometimes it isnt about doing your best, it is about doing something. I have also recently learned it's ok to NOT do anything sometimes. I have a bad habit of saying yes to everyone at the expense of myself. I am learnigng, slowly, that there are times I have to say no and that there are times I can not fix it. That is the hardest part for me. I am a fixer. I think that is why became a nurse. It is also why sometimes I hate being a nurse; there are times you just can't fix it.

So I ask for the strength to get thru the day and the strength to accept what comes.

Bubbles

One of the greatest joys of childhood is bubbles....cheap, inexpensive, soap bubbles. Rosie loves them. And I enjoy watching her. She just laughs and twirls trying to catch as many as she can. It is the best way to spend time on an afternoon.

Curveballs

Life has a way of throwing you curveballs. The convalidation mass is in 9 days, my wedding dress has gone missing (i will have to make a new one), the reception has had to be cancelled (due to it being planned for the backyard), Sean changed his schedule, so daycare has become a challenge, work has asked me to pick up days at another building to cover while they are without a nurse, my sisters arrive on Saturday, my parents arrive next wednesday and in the midst of all of this I have to pack up my house and move. Our landlord broke our lease a month early. Trying to find a house large enough for a 6 person family is challenging. We found one that is more than big enough but it needs some love. Life is crazy right now.

There is a quote attributed to Mother Teresa..."God only gives us what we can handle, but I sure wish he didnt trust me so much."....I think that sums things up nicely.

Getting things together

It is hard to make changes. I have found myself thinking about things in my life that need to change. I feel like I have been in a holding pattern for awhile now. Trying to figure out how to get started. It is overwhelming when you look at everything so I am focusing on just one thing at a time. This week my thing is to smile everyday and walk/jog for 30 min every day. I need to be happier with myself and feel good in my body again. This is totally selfish on my part. I am not doing this for anyone except me. That in and of itself is hard. I am good at doing for others but not very good at doing for my self.

Snow in April???

This is crazy. It is the middle of April and yesterday we had rain, hail, and snow all in the course of 5 minutes. It continued to snow and sleet the rest of the day. By the time I left work and headed home (6pm) we had an inch or so of snow on the ground. Now, being from Missouri this doesnt particularly bother me. However the Washingtonians who havent learned to drive in snow/sleet do bother me. This is the only place I have lived where people will actually abandon their vehicles rather than drive in snow.

The crazy part is last week we had a record high in the 70's with gorgeous sunshine.

Are you always that generous?

A man got on the bus, the fare was $1.50, he only had bills... no change. He asked me if I had change for a dollar. I did not. I did however have 50cents. So I offered it to him. He thanked me, paid the fare, and sat down. The rest of the ride was uneventful until we reached my stop. As I stepped off the bus, the driver asked me, "are you always that generous?" I thought it was an interesting question, because I didnt think I had done anything generous. My answer..."If I do something nice for him, maybe he'll do something nice for someone else." It is amazing to me that the act of giving someone 50 cents is considered generous.