Pouting and packing going on in my house

Got word yesterday that the rental house in Kearney should be ready to move into this coming weekend. Yes, it is quick but I sooo need to move. I have hit my max on patience with my grandfather. I need a break away from him. He is a stubborn, manipulative, pain in the a**. (at least we know I come by it honestly) If he were a resident at a facility where I worked, it wouldn't be so bad because I would get time away and two days off every week. Living with him I get no true break away from him. Yesterday was the icing on the cake for me. I had just finished scolding Ian for hiding the remote from grandpa. I took the remote away, changed the channel to CNN and gave the remote to grandpa. I walk out of the room and get 1/2 across the dining room only to hear Ian start screeching again. I figure grandpa has made a face at him or something similar and Ian was mad so he was screeching and walk back in ready to remove Ian from the room. INSTEAD, I find my grandfather smacking Ian. Open handed hitting him, where ever he could reach. Now I grant you my grandfather doesn't have much strength behind his hits but, HE WAS HITTING MY CHILD. I freaked! I completely lost my temper with him, yelling and pointing my finger. How dare he raise a hand to my child, my own mother doesn't even spank my children except in extreme circumstances. Oh, I was pissed. So now Ian has been banished from the front room and dining room. It is the only way I can keep him and grandpa apart. This is where the "very thankful I am moving next weekend" comes in. After all this happens, I apologized to grandpa for losing my temper and tried to talk to him about why I was so upset. He responses by telling me this just isnt working anymore and he is going to sell the house and move to a nursing home so he can just die. (Manipulative SOB) I reminded him the house was his and I reminded him I am moving to Kearney. He informs me he is moving back home to Bethany by himself until he dies. I again reminded him the house in Smithville is his, bought and paid for, and that he can not live on his own so Meg is moving up to the house to take care of him. Again he tells me that wont work, Meg has to many thing to do she cant take care of him, she has kids and a husband, blah, blah, blah. I bit my tongue. After another 10 minutes of this crap from him, I was quickly losing my temper again. I finally just got in his face and told him...Grandpa you do not get to do this to me. I am just as stubborn and pigheaded as you are. The house is paid for, you are staying here, I am moving out, Meg is moving in, AND YOU WILL BE NICE TO HER. This is the end of this discussion. Then I got up and walked out. He is still pouting this morning and I am packing.

Gut feelings

Sometimes it is a good idea to go with your gut feeling. My gut has been saying NO about the agency case since they told me it was in Odessa. So, over the weekend I put out several resumes, still unsure about the agency job. One of them was in reply to a craiglist ad for a Night Charge Nurse in Independence for a small (50 bed) nursing home. They called me this am and asked me to come in for an interview at 2p. I got hired on the spot after a 20 minute interview with the Director of Nursing.

Agency Job - 1.5 hr commute each way, $20/hr, 69 hr/payperiod

VS.

Nursing Home Job - 0.5 hr commute each way, $19/hr, 80hr/payperiod

Not a hard choice. I took the Nursing Home job. I have orientation tomorrow.

Moving on...

Well, the decision has been made. I am moving on. I have accepted a job with Maxim Health Care, a nursing agency, and will be moving as soon as I find a place. The past year and 1/2 has taken it's toll and I am ready to get back to my own life. Don't get me wrong, I would never had said no to taking care of my grandparents but I am glad things are working out that I can gracefully step out and let someone else put in their time. Since my grandmother passed there really isn't a need for a nurse full-time, Grandpa just need someone to make sure he is safe, cook for him and entertain him. Lisa or I can pop in once a week or so and do the "nurse things", like double check meds/INR checks and Meagan and her family are moving up here to the Smithville house to be "in charge".

I am happy that I can now get back to being a mom first and a nurse second. It is a big scary change though and I would be lying if I said I wasn't having my moments of anxiety about this. I am really and truly starting over.....again. New job, new place to live, just me and the kids. Wow!

P90X Day 6

Day six is here and I am not dead yet. Although, there have been several times this week I wish, someone would have put me out of my misery. Obviously it is working something because my legs have been killing me since Pylo day. Heres to make a commitment and sticking to it! As the guy says.....DO your best and forget the rest........BRING IT!

P90X day 1

I started the P90X workout today. I made it thru the whole workout, except the declined pushups. Those are still something that I can not do. I kiss the floor every time I try them. I am also using the modified version by being on my knees for pushups and using the bands for pull-ups. I tried to do the AbRipperX too. I did not feel as successful. I did all the exercises but could not do more than 10 of each. The routine calls for 25 of each. We will see if I can still move tomorrow. I already hurt.

Every journey starts with the first step.

Jan 3rd....More Snow

This was the view from out back deck this morning. We got another 1 1/2 inches on top of the 13 inches we already had.... And it is still snowing! We have a whopping 14 degrees for a high today.

I wonder if the kids will have a snow day for the first day back in 2010?

Last Family Get Together of 2009

Our last big bash of 2009. We all got together for a belated gift exchange.
Cookies, pumpkin cheesecake, wassail, and cocoa were on the menu.